Advice of the Day

Ever wonder about the difference between its and it's or what happens when a cow eats a rancid casserole?

Wonder no more.

'Bout to Make the Most Out of a Toaster

Even we serious people can be pros at amusing ourselves. This was one of my favorite songs in high school. (Yes, I know I'm a total dork.) Anyone remember it? This video is great! Why the heck didn't I think of this???

Nope. It's not profound. Don't look for hidden meanings; you won't find any. It's fun, fluffy, and oh-so-absurd. Boysenberry jam. Yum.

Blah blah blah blah. Blah.

Do you ever just feel like being quiet? Sometimes, I do. I seem to have dropped the ball on my one-beautiful-thing-per-day commitment. Well, I guess that's life. Who's perfect? Not I. I've seen quite a few beautiful things and had quite a few beautiful moments in the past few days, but haven't really wanted to share any of them. Sometimes and with some people, I think I'm more open than is expected, and it think it takes people aback, and I can't help it, and I don't really want to try to change it. Authenticity or die. But I can be as evasive as the next Jo. Right now, I don't have very much to say. I've been pouring myself out on paper and copper and people. It's been about all I can do.

'Tis the sixth day of Christmas. Six more to go. In some ways, it's been a much better Christmas for me than it usually is. I think that has a lot to do with actually talking about how Christmas makes me feel, which I've never done before. And my mom's having a better time of it than usual this year. I've been rather inside myself this past month, trying to stay afloat despite the ice in the air. I feel like this blog this month has been devoid of content. Sorry about that. The things about which I'm so passionate and I usually want so badly to talk don't have much sparkle to them right now. In fact, I'm only posting this equally-devoid-of-content entry partly out of a sense of duty and partly because, if I let myself get too far out of the habit of thinking "Hey, I have a blog now, I'd better write this down," I'll forget all about it. I'm probably not even going to proofread this. Probably.

I've been in the downward spiral of self-absorption lately. Do you know the one? It's the one where you squeeze your eyes shut and grit your teeth soooo hard against it, try to ignore the voices and the tightness in your chest, but when you peek a little, it's longer and deeper and no closer to going away, because ignoring what your soul is screaming at you to do only makes your soul more angry, more desperate, clingier and hungrier and colder. Every day I'm trudging up to the surface, inches and a few feet and then a few more inches, and then I trip and fall and slide down, down, all the way back down to the ground. Up, up, up, trip, dooooooown, up, trip, down. Argh! (Did I mention that my period should be starting tomorrow, freaking finally? Glory, hallelujah, it can't come sooner.)

The day after Christmas, Kevin's grandmother was placed in the memory ward of a nursing home because his aunt can no longer take care of her. Christmas night, we told her she was going. Oh, she'd heard about it before. But Grandma has no short-term memory. Zero. Zilch. So she thought it was the first she'd heard of it. That, friends, was not a pleasant conversation. And when we all got up in the morning, she'd completely forgotten who Kevin and I were. While the family moved her furniture, I stayed home with her and we chatted about her life, for about 4 hours. We talked about women's suffrage, her work for the Red Cross during WWII, the rationing, her husband's tours of duty overseas, the civil rights movement, integration of schools, racism, sexism, politics, the sixties, the moon landing. It was great. I love to talk to elderly people about their lives. And she told Kevin's mother that I was such a sweetheart, asked who I was, and wondered if I might come visit her sometime again soon. (I don't know why I told that story. I think I'm rambling.)

Last night was a lovely, lovely night. Kevin and I went to an at-home family birthday party (the best kind!) for a beautiful friend and spent time with her relatives from Sweden, which was a super-huge treat! I can't remember the last time I've enjoyed getting to know new people that much. Maybe I never have. They were some premiumly awesomerrific people. I think I might move to Sweden now. The cheer in the air was medicine for me, and there was so much laughter. In fact, I am laughing now, remembering. Yay.

Well, I think that's enough rambling. If you're still reading, thanks for listening. Break time's over, and it's time to get back to ... what was I reading? Uhhh [shuffling paper] ... the indigenous coinages of Persian-period Palestine as an allegory. Wish me monsters!*



*Obscure Joss Whedon reference.

No. 13

Kevin and I listened to this on our way to Ohio today. I lost count of how many times my heart quivered with the pleasure of discovering a kindred spirit and hearing at last the lyrics of so many melodies of my soul.

Love and shalom to you all, my friends.

Beannacht

by John O'Donohue

On the day when
the weight deadens
on your shoulders
and you stumble,
may the clay dance
to balance you.
And when your eyes
freeze behind
the grey window
and the ghost of loss
gets in to you,
may a flock of colours,
indigo, red, green,
and azure blue
come to awaken in you
a meadow of delight.

When the canvas frays
in the currach of thought
and a stain of ocean
blackens beneath you,
may there come across the waters
a path of yellow moonlight
to bring you safely home.

May the nourishment of the earth be yours,
may the clarity of light be yours,
may the fluency of the ocean be yours,
may the protection of the ancestors be yours.
And so may a slow
wind work these words
of love around you,
an invisible cloak
to mind your life.

I Simply Had Nothing to Wear!

Is it terrible that I made a little present for myself too? It's just that we're going to the theatre to celebrate Kevin's parents' 40th wedding anniversary on Saturday, and I had no jewelry that suited my only warm dress. And so I had to, for them, so that my lack of appropriate accessorizing wouldn't dampen the evening for anyone. Um. Yeah.

Nothing Beautiful to Report Today, But

Man. I believe I am sapped of all creative energy. This is a good time to be sapped, however, because I just put the last touch on the last gift that I had to make before I leave for Ohio. For the record, Laser Gold "top-quality-made-in-Switzerland" saw blades are complete crap. I broke three in four inches of sawing 24-gauge copper, for crying out loud. Not cool. (I know, you're probably thinking "Huh?" Just humor me and make a mad face, 'kay?)

It's been a good-but-way-too-busy few days. Until today. Today was a not-so-good-and-still-way-too-busy day. Mind if I vent? Well, for privacy's sake I can't do much venting in this public forum, actually, but let's just say my day received a thorough ruining just before I left for work, the kind of ruining that leaves me moody and welling with tears all day, torturing myself with emotionally charged music and talking myself out of calling people just to talk. Sigh. And I was keeping such a stiff upper lip too. It got better when I got home, but now I'm soooo tired. And there are still a house to clean, gifts to wrap, and bags to pack. And eight more hours of work that I get paid to do.

I don't actually have much to say right now. I guess I still just need to talk to someone. Hmmmm. But to talk about what?

Um. Okay, maybe I don't want to talk. Maybe I just want some quiet company. Do you mind if I sit here for a while with you and not talk? Really? Oh, thank you.

Ahh, I needed that. You can go now. Peace.

No. 12

Behold, the most resplendent Christmas hymn of them all.

O Holy Night! The stars are brightly shining,

It is the night of the dear Saviour's birth.

Long lay the world in sin and error pining.

Till He appeared and the Spirit felt its worth.

A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,

For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.

Fall on your knees! Oh, hear the angel voices!

O night divine, the night when Christ was born;

O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!

O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!

Led by the light of faith serenely beaming,

With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.

O'er the world a star is sweetly gleaming,

Now come the wisemen from out of the Orient land.

The King of kings lay thus lowly manger;

In all our trials born to be our friend.

He knows our need, our weakness is no stranger,

Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!

Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!

Truly He taught us to love one another,

His law is love and His gospel is peace.

Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother.

And in his name all oppression shall cease.

Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,

With all our hearts we praise His holy name.

Christ is the Lord! Then ever, ever praise we,

His power and glory ever more proclaim!

His power and glory ever more proclaim!